Sunday, September 20, 2009

If life gives you lemons

you're supposed to make lemonade as the old adage says.

I had grabbed some veggies from a local Asian market and was painting this Bok Choy and watching a documentary called, "Dear Zachery" on my computer. This movie chronicled the movie maker's friendship with his childhood buddy who is killed by his doctor girlfriend. His friend who was also a doctor just learned the girlfriend he was leaving was having his child. After his death, his parents try to win custody of their grandchild and is ultimately let down by the system.

I was weepy already from watching this film when my son calls me from his dad's. His dad and I don't see eye to eye on how to treat/deal with issues and I feel so powerless when my son is upset and I cannot go over and give him a big hug. I called his dad and I fight my natural compulsion to tell him what I really think of him try to make it his idea for an alternative way to deal with the issue.

I watch the rest of the documentary doing the ugly crying because of the tragedy of what these grandparents go through and my guilt of 1. not being able to do more for my kids and 2. feeling bad because it really isn't as bad as what these grandparents have gone through.

So if a painting of a vegetable in the cabbage family can reflect my dismal mood, then I've succeeded.

This is oil on 8x10 gessoboard.
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13 comments:

Dominic Philibert said...

Beautiful!!!!!!!

Lauren Maurer said...

Oh, no!! Sheila that is a terrible feeling to have to go through! Those grandparents had it bad,too but in matters of the heart (especially concerning children) there is no one situation that hurts more than another, I don't think. My heart goes out to you, but your bok choy is beautiful!

Diana Marshall said...

Sorry to hear of your frustrations and sadness, but your bok choi is beautiful. I hope you do well on ebay (I didn't) but you may do better, good luck anyway.

Manon Doyle said...

Beautiful painting ... bok choy is yummy!

Oh Sheila!! I can relate to the ugly cry.... I've done a lot of that myself lately. I'm sure you're doing the very best that you can in this situation. It's so hard to have dueling households. Be strong girlfriend!!

Nicki said...

Hi Sheila,

Thank you so much for stopping by my blog... it's nice to meet you. I was very intrigued when I read your profile- what an interesting career you have had, but surely you saw some disturbing things. How wonderful that you are discovering art in a new way in your retirement. I hope it is now bringing you the joy and happiness you deserve.

Your post today brought tears to my eyes as I tried to imagine how that phone call felt for you. Sometimes our love and concern for our children makes us literally ache. It is so difficult when we feel helpless to make things better for them. Thank goodness that you had your paint and bok choy to help you work through your emotions! Art is therapy! And your painting is lovely!

Take care,
Nicki

Judy Mackey said...

Sheila - your bok choy is beautiful...it is good to release and cry sometimes...it cleanses the soul.

Dean Grey said...

Sheila!

I'm sorry to hear your ex is bringing you down. I hope things can smooth themselves out for both sides.

If it makes you feel any better, I really like the color combinations in this painting.

The bright turquoise looks great against the brick red background!

Hang in there, girl!!

-Dean

AutumnLeaves said...

Sheila, so well I know the emotions of which you speak. For years I cried every time I had to drop my girls off at their dad's. The summer two week hiatus and the spring break hiatus had me pacing and crying each evening. We never agreed on values to teach the girls or anything else. But letting that go to tell you that I really like the bok choi...I've never had any and always wonder what it tastes like.

Mary Paquet said...

Sheila, art can be so wonderful when things are not going so well. I must say, inspite of your feeling down, this bok choy is beautiful!

Cathyann said...

Like Van Gogh, you are working it out supremely well through the colors and lines in this image.
I think that if many of us did not have our artwork into which we express these emotions, then I am afraid we would follow way too closely in his foosteps.
Nice work, Sheila.
Courage and hugs, C

suzanneberry said...

Sheila, i wish i knew some wise anecdote or proverb to write that could somehow instantly improve everything for you. You are one of the sweetest people I've met through blogging and it's just terrible to see that you are in pain. you are strong, determined and giving and your son knows how much you love and want to protect him. embrace the ugly cry, it's healing to let the emotions go through you instead of letting them pile up and consume you. i hope the ex finds it in his heart to agree to disagree and that things go more smoothly between the two of you so you can raise the kids apart, but still in a nurturing manner. hang in girl and many hugs and much peace joy. best, suz

tsp said...

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, it became a butterfly.

Lokelani Forrest said...

Hi Sheila...I'm sorry that I've missed so many of your posting, but am going to get caught up. I expected notifications by email, but that didn't happen. Glad I visited here today. I'm so sorry...I know how it feels not to be able to hug your child when they are upset. Hope things get better for you.